McKennedy Sweetcorn Relish from LIDL

Well this stuff is like taking a shit whilst still wearing your fuckin trousersuit!!!  ITS FUCKIN MANKY!!!  I went into LIDL one day, as you do and rolled by the sauce/relish isle and said to myself, hmm, i think i'll treat myself to a jar of relish, they had this nice lookin jalapenis, i mean jalapeno one sorry, that looked very nice indeed but was a bit on the pricey side so i said ah fuck it, ill try this sweetcorn one, it didnt look too bad in the jar INFERNUS(oh thats the car from GTA, sorry) INFAIRNESS, haha,!  It looked rather appetising actually, so I paid for this stuff along with a bunch of other items and left the place.  I unlocked my bike, I got on my bike, I, I, I, why am I telling you all of this when I need to be warning you about the dangers of this relish!! I got home and decided I would make a sanger(sandwich) so I did, i put on the filling then put on this STUFF, I took a bite and holy fuck, fuck fucking me, it was like there was a party in my mouth and everyone was slinging SHITE at this said party!!!  The taste was very unpleasant, very unpleasant indeed, I didnt like it, I had been stabbed in the back once again, except this time it was LIDL that done it, I need to drop theyre knife back into them next time im in there, steer well clear of this condiment if you know whats good for you, oh yeah and one of the ingredients is CAULIFLOWER, i only seen that when I was dumping the fuckin thing, who puts cauliflower in RELISH, ahhhhhhhhhhh!!! MANKY!!! Seeya soon and it wont be in LIDL!!!! Tatty bye my pedigree chums!!